Training is the process of getting the mind and body to the point where the heart desires.

I want to fight for you. If fighting for you means bettering myself, then better myself i will.

If you were a teardrop in my eye, for fear of losing you, i would never cry.

Maybe, in another universe.

Maybe, just maybe.

In another universe.
In another reality.
In another time.

You didn't disappear.

I spent these times with you.

Happy beyond words.

The days would mash into the nights and the nights into the days.

Lines of time blurred and bliss was all that remained.

As we prepare to part, we anticipate our next reunion.

Though bittersweet, the memories will be all that we have and yet sufficient to last us through.

The parting moment would be felt with so much sorrow and filled with equal, if not more, amounts of love. Darkness and light would intertwine in a beautiful melody of grey.

Sadly, no maybes.

I am in this universe.
This isn't an alternative reality.
And I am at this exact moment in time.

You disappeared.

I am alone, now and times gone by.

All anticipation which once was have been reduced to ashes.

That part of me, which you had access to, died.

That part of you, which i loved, is gone.

And if we were to ever cross paths again one day, i would tip my hat and be on my way.

What is left of me will never bear to look at what is left of you.

Maybe just maybe, that part of you is together with that part of me.

That longing would be complete.

Just not in this universe, not in this reality, not in this time.

It really has been a journey of self discovery. I feel much stronger already.

This struck home.

Gemini would rather be naive than know the depressing truth. Trust me. We know. We just act like we don't.

心里揪着揪着疼

Maybe one day.

Maybe one day, you'll see past what's on the outside to see what's deep inside and see me for who i really am.

Maybe one day, it wouldn't matter how you see me on the outside as it'll reflect how i truly am deep inside.

Maybe one day.

That day is coming.

And so it begins, again. Interaction.

I'm bored. And i'm in the train. So i thought to myself. What a perfect time to blog and pen my thoughts!

Recently, i've been looking back on certain instances when a joke almost developed into a feisty situation. It usually is a fine fine line between humour and insensitivity.

When people get comfortable, they open up. The act of opening up shows trust. Trust that you're free to express your view and that it'll be taken with a pinch of salt, without it being personal.

Sadly, that isn't always the case. Both parties may not be on the same page. One might feel more comfortable than the other actually is. And when in a group chat setting, where messages are communicated without tone of voice, pauses and facial expressions, one is often misunderstood.

The onus is on the individual to try not to say anything which might provoke a unfriendly retort. Unless you're out to hurt, then by all means let it rip.

And if we're the one receiving the information, try to give the other party the benefit of doubt. The relationship would have been at a certain level before one might feel comfortable so why jeopardise all that with the misunderstanding of a careless remark?

In this day and age, loads of our communication takes place digitally. Let us practice digital social etiquette. Digital communication is here to stay, we might as well make it productive and enjoyable.

ps. suddenly, i'm reminded of 宫心计's 刘三好's famous saying, "做好事, 说好话, 存好心".

Just because you want to be treated like a princess and someone treats you like a princess, doesn't mean he's your prince.

For you? No. For me.

Sometimes, the smallest things enable people to make the biggest decisions. This is the end of Dis "For you" series.

For you.

=)

I don't how it happened but my blog is turning to an extension of my twitter, which really doesn't make sense. I have stopped trying to intitate another blog-writing coming, considering that i've had so many failed over the years. Now, i'll just try to pen longer thoughts if this old brain of mine allows me to.

明明就不习惯牵手，为何却主动把手勾。

For You.

落花有意随流水,流水无情恋落花。

For you.

Weary.

For you.

For you, 生活可能不完美但这并不代表它不美。

For you.

It's tiring hearing no so often.

Timing

Timing is EVERYTHING.

The Blogger app is finally available for me!

For you.

This is for you.

 Here's a tissue for your issue. http://instagr.am/p/Mc8ZWKy_Lx/

To trust, first, you need to doubt.

Reboot.

If you only knew, you're all i ever wanted.

We stuff our stomaches silly because our hearts are empty.

Sometimes, it just gets so tiring.

百世修来同船度,千世修来共枕眠.

I am so bad at navigation. One wrong turn and i find myself back on Memory Lane.

I didn't choose. It was your choice which chose for me.

It's amazing the clarity that comes at 6am in the morning.

五月天 - 我不願讓你一個人

I am freaking addicted to this song. I think i have listened to it no less than a hundred times these couple of days. It really is on mad repeat.

你說呢 明知你不在 還是會問
空氣 卻不能代替你 出聲
習慣 像永不癒合 的固執傷痕
一思念就撕裂靈魂

把相片 讓你能保存 多洗一本
毛衣 也為你準備多 一層
但是 你孤單時刻 安慰的體溫
怎麼為你多留一份


我不願讓你一個人 一個人在人海浮沉
我不願你獨自走過 風雨的 時分
我不願讓你一個人 承受這世界的殘忍
我不願眼淚陪你到 永恆

你走後 愛情的遺跡 像是空城
遺落你杯子手套和 笑聲
最後 你只帶走你 脆弱和單純
和我最放不下的人
也許未來 你會找到 懂你疼你 更好的人
下段旅程 你一定要 更幸福豐盛

我不願讓你一個人 一個人在人海浮沉
我不願你獨自走過 風雨的 時分
我不願讓你一個人 承受這世界的殘忍
我不願眼淚陪你到 永恆

你說呢 明知你不在 還是會問
只因 習慣你滿足的 眼神
只是 我最後一個 奢求的可能
只求你有快樂人生

只求命運 帶你去一段 全新的旅程
往幸福的天涯飛奔
別回頭就往前飛奔
請忘了我還 一個人

If you want to feed the pigeons, BRING THEM HOME!

Special delivery! I totally can feel the love! #EggsBenedict!

No #BrusselsSprouts but at least there's #Broccoli!

Monday is Saladay!

Valentine's Day is like the annual bonus. People stick around for it long enough but once it's here, they revaluate and, more often than not, decide to move on.

The thing to make happy HAPPIER!

Is the mug half full or half empty? Neither. It's all happy.

Michael Schumacher

Picture with The Legend himself. What up.

Kids

Kids, nowadays, have a Messiah Complex. The system will not fail just because you fall sick. People will pick up the slack.Things are not THAT urgent and you are not THAT important. It is just data crunching. So stop painting the self sacrificial picture.

Mondays.

The day when work normally starts. The day which i usually dread. It signals the end of the previous weekend and is an indicator of the long way to the next. Sometimes, i feel sorry for the day, disliked for no fault of it's. I shall try to like Mondays more and hope that it ends on a high. Here's to a bluetiful Monday.

I guess we have established the fact that Karma is a bitch. Now, the question is how good can she count?

Karma is a bitch. She will get you. Eventually. Don't think that just because it's 3am in the morning, no one's watching. Big Brother is watching.

When i tell you that you deserve to be happy, it's true. I sincerely feel for you and your unrequited love. You can ask me when you see me.

I'm sorry, Rafael Nadal and Andy Murray, but your match just isn't able to make me lose sleep the way Novak Djokovic and Roger Federer's did.

US Open Men's Semi Finals 1

Novak Djokovic wins Roger Federer 3-2, after losing the first two sets. Roger really made it tough for himself but kudos to Novak for having the testicular fortitude. Balls of steel. Despite being on the back foot most of the match, Novak played with a smile and believed in himself. Attitude of a Champion.

Ok. Tony Tan won. He is now the 7th President of Singapore.

Should i catch the Europe Super Cup between Barcelona and Porto? Nah. Don't think so. Tonight, sleep reigns.

I feel like catching Tavia tomorrow.

我有可能会眼花，偶尔会口花花，但我的心绝对一点都不花。

Having KFC breakfast is the perfect way to start a Friday, pity there isn't any hash brown.

Android really should have a proper blogging app. The one by Google is not available on my phone yet and that totally sucks.

It is interesting to know that a lot of people in Singapore boil their water before drinking when we have one of the cleanest sources around.

One Week Anniversary

My first post from my Samsung Galaxy S2. It's been a week since i made the transition from my trusty old Nokia N95 8GB and i'm loving it! This is so going to make me blog so much more frequently.

Honey, i'm home!

It has been a very long while since I last saw you. I miss you. It's been long. Too long.

It's that time of the year again. I miss you.

My Nokia N95 8GB is dying. I feel like changing my phone but I have no idea what to change to.

It is not as easy to blog on the phone as it is easy to tweet on the phone. The blogging interface took me so long to post that i almost gave up. It's not user friendly at all.

No two people or things have the same level of importance or emotional weightage. I should stop treating them like they do.

Maybe i should get a new phone. Yihan's phone was low on battery so he borrowed mine and wanted to record something. After fiddling for a while, he finally gave up and asked me for help. Dude, my phone is a Nokia N95 8GB. It does not have a touchscreen.

I am so disappointed that I feel like crying.

成功男人背后永远有个支持他的女人，可是成功女人背后总有道无法磨灭的伤痕.

Carrie always said my blog is full of football stuff. So, to not disappoint her, this is my ARSENAL wallpaper. Kindly contributed by Wee Keat.

After finishing the University of London's Principles of Banking and Finance paper yesterday, I was walking out of Singapore Expo Hall 9 when I saw this.
I have to admit it. This really requires some kahunas. How often do you throw away your notes right after you walk out of the examination venu? Like what I once tweeted about, it ain't over until the fat lady sings. But sometimes, the fat lady sings the wrong tune and hits all the wrong notes. I would like to see the faces of the owners of these notes in three months time IF the worst case scenario happened.

if you're not down with jiji then i've got 2 words for you

hey buddy, thanks for the call. a very simple but deeply appreciated gesture. =)

if only i were to meet you now, we would have been a better fit.

周杰伦 - 我不配

这街上太拥挤
太多人有秘密
玻璃上有雾气
在背影照进过去
你脸上的情绪
在怀念那场雨
这小弄太过完全 走不回过这里
这日子孤单里 又班驳了结局
剩下半空回忆的我在大房子
第一眼的注意
更遥远的距离
感情没有对手戏你跟自己下棋
还来不及
仔细心细
写下你的关于
描述我如何爱你
你却微笑的离我而去

这感觉已经不对
我努力在挽回
一些些应给的体贴
但感觉我没给
你如此碎的愿望
很卑微 在凋谢
是我忽略你不过要的安慰

这感觉已经不对
我最后才了解
一页页不能翻阅
但情节你好累
你我的卑微为我掉过几次泪而憔悴
而我心碎你受罪你的美
我不配

我不配 on loop in my head after meeting 曾愷玹

The day I met 曾愷玹

曾愷玹
曾愷玹 again
曾愷玹's side profile. I really could not tell the difference.


Today was the day I met 曾愷玹.

Ok, maybe not her but someone who looks so similar that it just totally feels like her.

I was on a bus, minding my own business, wondering where in the world did my earphones disappeared to when SHE appeared. Yes. Her. Not S.H.E but 曾愷玹. The wind was knocked out of me before I was even able to react.

I had noticed her performances in 不能說的秘密 but what really caught my eye was her appearance in 周杰倫's 我不配 music video. People who karaoke with me often, meaning Wee Keat, Ee Suan, Junming can attest to me choosing this song all the time. I watch more of the music video and leave the singing to them. The scene where she's playing with Jay on the bed is mindblowing.

To see someone who is a splitting image of her is like watching her walk out of the television set and into real life. NO. I AM NOT COMPARING HER TO SADAKO. DON'T EVEN GO THERE. She was standing right in front of me, less than a metre away. It was a very surreal experience. She had really big eyes with really long eyelashes and a mesmerising smile. How can someone be so perfect?

Well, she was perfect until I saw the guy next to her. I could accept a Jay or a Show, but Joe? She was looking into his eyes with so much love and affection that I was traumatised. I would really need to schedule a session with my psychaitrist soon. Somehow, the Average Joe always have ALL the luck.

This would be me suffering the classic symptoms of the I-REALLY-HAVE-NO-IDEA-WHAT-SHE-SEES-IN-HIM syndrome. Sophie tried explaining to me that in Elements of Social Applied Psychology, they explained this syndrome. Something along the lines where when a mismatch occurs, we detect it immediately. For me, the voice in my head just keeps going What The Fuck?!³. It's like how Neo is able to detect a Deja Vu in the Matrix so easily.

She got off in Sengkang. The bus stop she alighted at indicated she lived pretty close to my friend. So near and yet so many lightyears away. She left me wishing to Santa Claus/Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy/财神爷/月老/My Fairy Godmother for the same luck Joe got. I promise to be a good kid for a very very very very long time.

All in all, I'm glad I got to see her. It will be the closest I will ever get to meeting someone like that. It was anything but a boring bus ride. Now, where did I place my earphones again?

The Mob

Yesterday, I was waiting for a bus at Serangoon Bus Interchange. The bus i was waiting for was 101, beside it was the queue for 315. There were people in both queues and quite a number of people gathered around the head of the queue. Bus 101 came and stopped in front of the queue. People in the queues started to make a move.

At this point of time, the people in the queue for 101 took a few steps and stopped. The door of the bus was open. The driver looked at them, the people looked back at him but nobody took any action. Everyone was standing still and I wondered what was happening. The driver looked behind and saw Bus 315 behind.

I knew something was amiss and made a run for it but I could not get to the bus at all. The people who were standing around apparently were all waiting for 315. Everyone was waiting for 315, including the people in the queue for 101. Can anyone please explain to me, if you're waiting for 315, why are you standing in the queue for 101? Moron.

They were sticking close to one another, so afraid of people getting past and to the front. These people exhibited good defending, good positional awareness and a never give up attitude. These people were ugly Singaporeans. They totally didn't take other people into consideration. If I was a football manager, I will get them to play as defenders. Their defending was so good even Messi would not have been able to get through. This was a water tight defence. Silvestre, please take note, it would be good if you learned to defend like that.

Before I know it, the driver closed the door and drove off. I made a run for it to the next bus stop. Luckily, luck was on my side this time and I got it. I am just sick to my stomach how people can be so inconsiderate.

This has been a very watered down and mellow account of what happened yesterday. If you're wondering whether I was exploding with expletives, the answer is YES. A certain Miss Sophie Lim heard the outburst and can testify to having heard me on the verge of exploding, or rather, exploded. So for all you ugly Singaporeans out there, please play nice unless you're looking to be crushed under a huge mass anytime soon.

I am a famer.

For all who want fame, please approach me! We will all be famers.

I am fat and I game.

I caught the quarterfinals match of the Dubai Open between Ivan Ljubicic and Novak Djokovic. It ended in a Djokovic victory, 4-6, 6-4, 6-0. Ljubicic played well. He held his serve and broke Djokovic's, twice. The moment his serve got broken, he lost the set, lost the remaining of his serves and lost the game.

Ljubicic was very patient in the beginning, bided his time and waited for an opening. Ljubicic, the ex world number 3 looked like upsetting the tie, the fans and Djokovic to grab a totally unexpected win. But that was not to be. Ljubicic started to get aggressive, wanting to end the tie quickly, he started making runs to the net, trying drop shots and slices. Djokovic immediately capitalised, making Ljubicic run, made Ljubicic make mistakes by the truckload and himself playing some great tennis.

In the end, Ljubicic's body and luck lost out to Djokovic's. I guess Djokovic winning was an inevitability but Ljubicic did not deserve to lose 6-0 in the last set. When Djokovic broke Ljubicic's first serve of the third set, Ljubicic had a glazed look. His gaze was hollow. He had a look of resignation. His body language only asked for the match to be ended quickly. I felt so sad for him. One of the saddest recently, besides for myself of course. His will to win was gone. What was so close ended up being so far.

Djokovic ended the match quickly and put him out of his misery. It was cruel but this is tennis.

i'm not going to say much.. but if you're thinking of shopping.. this is a good webbie to go to.. =)

Fashtag

hey gabe, if you are ever reading this, know that i will always miss you. hope you're rocking the house down in canada.

I just had to say this.

HUNTER X HUNTER is back.!!!!

wooohooo~~~!!! =)

I finally completed Dragon Age: Origins. It really was not bad, quite good. The only pity is there wasn't more dragons for me to slay. I am looking forward to the sequel already. Maybe I should start on my other games OR play it one more time! =)

You were my first.

But I had to let you go.

Circumstances did not allow the alternative.

I despair at my own inability.

May we meet again.

Until then, know that I love you.

It has been a very long time since I last saw Boon Chyuan. Lunch with him and Wee Keat was good, or rather the whole meet up was good. I do see Wee Keat quite a bit but I only see him once in a blue moon. Let's hope that changes.

I learnt quite abit of Boon Chyuan's recent past today. There really is technique in asking questions the correct way. He was more forthcoming with things he had been keeping from us, maybe due to my neverending stories. Both of them really laughed their asses off.

On a more serious note, Boon Chyuan really showed me a whole new perspective of the incident. One perspective I had not thought about before. I guess the situation could have been handled better and it would have been much more pleasant. Sometimes, things just don't go our way. Even though this incident could have been improved from a much earlier time, it still screwed up. Too little too late, not that it's too big a deal now.

A New Blog Is Upon Us. Rock On.

First post in nearly 2 months so it'll be a rather short one for now. SHIFU!! I'm not sure if you're reading this but your latest post about Langdon really spoilt it for me! I haven't read it yet. =(

I don't think I have the best Dad in the world.

I know I have the best Dad in the world.

After 9 days since it started, my Reservist has finally ended.

Overall, this was a not bad incamp training but it could have been better without the emergence of "The Active". What is "The Active"? "The Active" is a being who despite being a NS Man acted like a NSF. This term can be applied to any officer, specialist or man. In this incident, The Active is referred to a certain specialist. Usually The Active has the uncanny ability to rub reservists in the wrong way. The higher the rank, the bigger the number of people affected. I'll skip the details but it ended with another specialist of a higher appointment indirectly apologising for him and trying to get the rest of the people to understand. Now, that would have been avoided if The Active had asked nicely, not brought his temper, attitude and rank to a perfectly fine working environment with the rules of the game being unspoken. All I can say to him is "Chill, Dude.".
Ah Gu and his hangover.

The reservist ended with a cohesion at Tampines Safra, having the standard bowling and archery itinerary. Bowling and archery was something we were never too fond off, we chose to play DOTA instead. It had been nearly 3 years since I had played. I don't even remember what to or not to do anymore. The majority of the guys on my team were either new, lousy or totally out of touch, with me being the lousy one. It was not a bad game of DOTA but a pathetic one. We were trashed, owned and destroyed. Somehow, it did bring a desire to pick up DOTA all over again but thankfully the desire disappeared after the third second it was brought back.

After outprocessing, we had lunch at Ah Gu's workplace, the Nihon Mura at Tampines Stadium. The place is quite crowded for a friday afternoon though. There are quite a few kids around, guess that could be due to the schools around in a heartland area. Lunch was just the few of us from the same batch, me, Mark, Leonard, Koon, Gu and Zhiyuan. We practically ordered everything on the menu. Some of the sashimi was not too fresh but the salmon and tuna was not too bad. The fresh grey prawns are a must try! I always thought that they should be cooked but I was glad I tried it due to constant coaxing from Zhiyuan. Food is one thing I can trust him on. The grey prawns totally did not have the prawny smell usually associated with not too fresh prawns, maybe due to the freshness of it. The taste and texture of the prawns were brilliant. I would never have stopped if not for the fact that I hated to deshell it by hand or rather, Zhiyuan's hands. The chicken wings were good too, even though it was just seasoned with salt and pepper. The taste of the chicken was really brought out well without anything overpowering it. Another favourite of mine were the hotate mentai and iwatako mentai, the cheese on top of it was to die for. Besides all the standard menu items, we had a lot of special items due to Gu and his colleague connections. The only regret for all these was that too much eating and we totally forgot about photograph taking. I just got to do this again sometime soon.
Me and Koon's R6 2006
Me and Zhiyuan's Honda

I realised I look quite good on a bike therefore I should go get one.
We caught Tansformers: Revenge of the Fallen after lunch. Koon had to go as he had something on with his cousin.
What's up with this? =P

Since we had a little time before the movie, we had some good old coffee bean frappes and even more chatting.

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen had a good soundtrack, lots of action, lots of Megan Fox, lots of Shia LaBeouf. Have I mentioned Megan Fox is so hot she sizzles? Her eyes are just so.. so.. perfect! Shia LaBeouf is super cute too!

Storywise, there isn't really one. I thought Optimus was too strong at the end, he should get his trailer. Megatron should have been renamed Galvatron and everything seemed so simple without any difficulty for anyone. Nonetheless, I would catch it again, not for the story though.

It was a good day with the guys and we really should do it again soon.

Due to the lovely reservist I just had, I have not gamed for a very long time, therefore I need new games soon!

I am so supposed to meet my bestie for dinner tomorrow but since she is always so busy, I guess that is another rain check. ps. to bestie, if you are reading this, i'm not always the one standing you up! =P

After everything, I do miss You.

Jerry's BBQ and Grill

Ever since I was posted to Seletar Camp in June 2005, I have always eyeballed this place everytime I passed by. Hidden at a small corner, it seemed to be able to just rely on its reputation to survive. So be it on the way to or fro from work, or out on work, it always looked like a must try.

Four years down the road, I finally tried it. The Jalan Kayu Branch.

Dinner with Mark was good. That would be because the company was good. It has been nearly a year since we met up, had dinner and just chatted. Sadly, the food was not as good as I had hoping for it to be. Service was terrible, if there was any service to begin with. The famous ribs were quite normal. Drinks were normal. Dessert, too, was normal. The only saving grace were the Buffalo Wings. Overall, it was a rather overpriced bill for a rather common experience. 40bucks per person should have gotten something better somewhere else. I should not have stepped in to this place at all. At least, I would have been left wanting and not have all hopes dissolved this way.

I have just been awed again. Take a step back, 飞伦海. Move away, 棒棒糖. Here comes Super Junior! I was totally caught offguard during their 金曲奖 performance. It was really quite good. I finally understand the Korean hype a little better. =)

ps. On a side note, 五月天 took the title for best band! ROCK ON!

Starhub 100mpbs Boost

Not too long ago, I took up the trial by Ripplevox for the latest technology from Starhub. The 100 mbps boost to my internet connection. In turn, I have to do a little write up on it. I thought this was fair enough as the thoughts of surfing at such speeds were very tempting. It reminded me of the Singtel Magix days which I sadly missed out on.

The service of the internet connection is quite similar. It becomes unresponsive occasionally, usually after being connected for long periods. Downloading is much faster for certain local websites but the surfing beyond that are largely the same. There is a faster experience with the boost but that does not happen all the time. There are instances where high speeds were reached. Overall, the boost has a faster surfing and downloading experience, with some websites being able to fully utilise this.

Reservist in 8 more hours.

What done is done.

As usual, rash like always.

Why does this always happen to me?

I am pissed.

It appears that nothing can prevent this slide.

Why do I not trust myself more?

Another lesson is waiting to be learnt.

On a sidenote, I seem to be losing friends by the bucketloads.

How can you call me uncle?

Of all people, YOU!

So mean!

So so mean!

I am always constantly learning. I really have a knack for such lessons. I really want to stop learning such things. This must be the process of fine tuning for me. Here we go again. =(

Why is the resistance there? I want to see the resistance broken!

I finally did it! The 50.0 popularity for Facebook Restaurant City! =)

Unexpected. You are really unexpected. The call was unexpected. So was your information during the call. Truly unexpected. =)

I did an experiment. The results showed that I have lost a friend. Sad. =(

I am so in love with 阮經天. =)

I sincerely thank you for being my friend. One of the best things to happen to me thus far. Really.

ps. don't ask me who this is =)

Roger Federer beat Rafael Nadal 6-4, 6-4 to clinch the Madrid Open.

It is true that this is not a grand slam. BUT. It was played on clay. Nadal's favourite. This marks the first victory of Federer in 2009, seems like the Fed Express is back in commission. The days of Nadal could be beginning to end. =)

It feels like my exams are over.

Sadly, it isn't.

=(

Sometimes in life, you pawn people.

Other times, you get pawned.

Today, I got pawned. Big Time.